Please leave the fan on when You Poo..

~Wow the day ended and it really felt like a friday (but Your momma feels like Xmas morning)….judging by the glass of wine I am having it was clearly a thursday! (Stags Leap…git sum!) Shortly after conversing with You fine people…I was “shock and awed” by the events that lay ahead. Here’s how the shit went down bitchez::

Hotti pulls up in the load zone. On a Harley. Dark hair. Hazel (not Gayzel, cuz then he would be perfect and not guilty of the formentioned) eyes. leather jacket. clean shaven. filling out er’part of his jeans. great smile. amazing energy. about 5.9…(but for fantasy sake he was 6.2) orders a latte. sits outside having a riders break or some shit i dont know about…prolly thinking about a particular barista making out with one ALEC BALDWIN…anyways its my blog so …hot guy…harley…great smile…sounds good so far yeah?…yeah!…Well thats when the shit hit the fan….seriously…He belined thru the shoppe and got lost in some PoopaPalooza Vortex in the back of the shoppe for about half an hour. ( almost went in to check on him….then tought F That…no DiGitty!!!)  Finally he is thrust back into reality and cruises thru the shoppe out to the patio for a quick smoke before he jumps on his harley (8 pounds lighter I think) and rides off.  Like nothing happened….LEAVING THE LOO DOOR OPEN!!!….let Me tell You who was on the door like a duck on a junebug…The Gayzel!!!!!
( You guessed…not Cuz I am into dookey….because the shoppe is only 800sq. feet)…nobody needs to be around that. Now my afternoon is ruined. I am gonna have to forget about ever asking Him out….completly throw away the Black Bean Chili sandwich I heated up….and shut that door and leave the fan on. Damn. Damn. DAMN….I was really hungry too! 😦  thats right sad face for the sammich!…and no shit…sad face for who ever he shares a house with maybe a dbl sad face…  😦    😦     …..Now here is the money shot…His drink was in with him the whole time…..EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. I need another glass of wine now! BRB.

 

~Ok now that I have made you all sexy inside…I hope You have a nice peaceful 9/11 evening. Say a word for those here and those passed and be thankful for where you are and will be soon, call your folks and maybe donate to a charity or just smile at some person who hates you. They will still hate you, but for today, they will really find you unattractive. I hope some of the cafe peeps are having a nice evening reflecting. I hope the Chia drinking, diamond cutter is out having some nice wine with his buddies  Mike and the other guy and his huge nipples…I hope Mr. P is getting his crazy ass dog drunk or stoned…that dog could use it….I also hope My dirty hippi Burning man friend didnt get hit by a Metro while walking home in a Salvia haze…I am guessing the dead beat dad is putting lotion on sump’n…I am also guessing the cafe slut is on Craigslist finding sum Suki Suki!!! (and good for her)…(but not really)…I am certainly sure Tom Cruise is playing gay bingo at Spacey’s house…I am Fo Sho that My Grumpy old man is touching light switches and counting tiles in his apt while He kisses the NY times sunday crossword…I know w/o a doubt the green eyed monster is having a Jeigermeister somewhere in London..and the Locness is on His way home….(GODZIRRAAAAHHHHH!!!!! I had to )…w/o a doubt the white shedevil is def bouncing a check somewhere is the greater Seattle area and/but not limited to the greater Puget Sound…I am pretty sure Bitchface is on match dotcom lying about being a chick with a dick….Fo Sho…My best friend is prolly stuck in some Sushi joint….and Jean Enerson is scaring the public with some cell based brain attacker, while she breast feeds Pinnoccio…and some where some place…a harley riding…wall paper peeling….latte drinking…great smiling…thick assed, jean wearing…heavy brow having….full lipped talking…hazel eyed blinking…strut out cut it out walking, sexy man is proving that no matter Who you are…Your shit still stinks.    Enjoy Your dinner….Mooches Gayzel.

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